As I stood glancing into the deserted antique store, curiosity drawing me closer, to the magnificent broad brown doors. I slowly heaved open the tall doors and cautiously slipped through. Cobwebs rested on the old and unsteady walls, the windows were smashed. I heard footsteps pounding against the brown wooden floor. “It’s okay, Anna” I said reassuring myself. “No one would call a run down place like this home”. The wind was howling outside, the whole place was filled with dust and it smelt old and it looked tatty and unwanted, it was horrible. Then I herd a loud slam, I looked behind me the doors were shut. “I don’t remember closing the doors” I thought to myself, and I had to heave them open I can’t imagine the wind being that strong to close them shut. I was beginning to feel scared as if someone was watching me, why did I always have to investigate things. “Who are you, what do you want?” I screamed. I heard echoing footsteps coming closer. “Leave me alone, please!”
“ What are you doing in my house?” the voice bellowed sounding loud and deep.
By Zara Costello
2 comments:
Super writing Zara. Nice images and sounds created e.g. ‘The wind was howling outside, the whole place was filled with dust and it smelt old and it looked tatty and unwanted,’
I see that you are stretching you vocabulary
Well done Zara
Great writing Zara!!!!
I like the way you used the senses to create an airy feeling to your story.
I also liked the way it ended on a climax. e.g “ What are you doing in my house?” the voice bellowed sounding loud and deep.
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