Sunday, September 11, 2011

Immortal Child - By Kahlia

I was driving through the outskirts of London, searching for a big white house which belonged to my sister Imogen. Then I saw her. She was pretty in all her features. She sat miserably on the long dry grass at the side of the road.

I slowed down to get a better look. She stared at me with tears streaming down her face.
I had an over whelming urge to reach out and touch her, to wipe away the tears clinging on her face. I stopped and pulled over next to her “ Do you want a ride” I said as sweetly as I could.
“Yes” she said in a lovely voice.

I thought about what to do. I didn’t know if my sister would approve of me bringing an orphan girl but I didn’t particularly care. I said “hop in” and she did obediently. She was relieved to be somewhere warm. Then there was a very loud noise and a scream echoed from out of the car. I realized bullets were shooting to aim for the orphan girls heart. “What was that” I asked. “ They are trying to kill me because I am the immortal child”

By Kahlia

2 comments:

Marguerite said...

Truly amazing! I loved the describing words; eg, overwhelming, miserably, echoed, and it has a great storyline. I'd love to hear more! :D

eva said...

This is a great story Kahlia, I like your vocabulary e.g overwhelming. It comes all a bit suddenly and it could possibly need more description. Also the sentence "She was pretty in all her features" just doesn't sound right, it makes sense but it just doesn't sound right.

LOVE EVA AND SAM!!! <3